Really? Seriously? Why me?

Where do I even begin? There's a saying - no news is good news - but in my case, no news means I have been living in a state of denial and have not wanted to put into words what my body has been telling me.

So, here's the story . . . Earlier this year, I started having serious problems with my back - back spasms, etc. Kathy, my active isolated stretching guru, kept telling me that my psoas was locked in place. In fact, I saw her 3 times in one week and she commented that she thought it was time for me to see Dr. Philippon because something was wrong. Ugh! Did she really say that out loud I thought. She must be mistaken. There's nothing wrong!! I must be doing something wrong so if I can just figure out what that is, I can fix it. That lead me down a path of doing too much, doing too little and trying to do just enough. Nothing worked. In fact, I got worse.

I was in Las Vegas in April and literally couldn't walk. Not a place to have difficulty walking let's just say. All of the psoas stretching in the world didn't relieve it. I was just about in tears. I spent more time in the pool. I made rash promises to whoever would listen that I would do anything if they could make this go away. No go. In fact, both Kathy and Sharon, my pt, told me that they thought I needed to see Dr. Philippon. Did I listen? Nope . . too busy at work, want to enjoy my summer, planted a garden and can't leave it, have to shampoo my dog. . . . but I finally admitted to myself and then out loud to several of my friends that something was wrong. I was sick about it. My one year surgery anniversary came and I really knew that something was wrong. I knew because I remembered my one year anniversary from my right hip and was 100% at one year. I couldn't even claim to be 85% at one year for my left. Ugh! I was sick, still in denial and didn't want to think about it. So, I pushed on.

I finally called Vail and talked to Mark who listened graciously to my tale of woe, asked a few key questions and declared - scar tissue. I was relieved and sick all at the same time. I was so sure that my left hip surgery would be as flawless as my right that I never even for one second considered that it might not be. Wow!! Floored me but I was so relieved that he could guess by my symptoms what it might be. About 5% -- please note 5 (five) percent of hip surgery patients have this happen. It's low; it's almost so low that you have to think - that would NEVER happen to me. Well, guess what -- it did. Crap!

So, I begin my journey back out to Vail in August to have an MRI and see Dr. Philippon. Mark tells me that the course of treatment will be an injection in the muscle (i am not spending a lot of time thinking about that because it makes me incredibly light headed when I do), a waiting period of about 12 weeks to see what effect that has, potentially another shot if the first one doesn't work and, as a last resort, another hip surgery. Wow. Hearing it, saying it and seeing those words in a blog are different. But there it is . . . potentially another hip surgery.

August 4, I will begin the next phase of the left hip. I wish it were next week because I am tired of fighting the fight. My back hurts, I can't walk without a lot of pain and I'm crabby. I had planned big things for this year and haven't been able to follow through. This just wasn't in my plans. :-)

All of that being said, I am ready to deal with this. Whatever has to happen will happen and I will be 100% again.Back to blogging . . . . phase 2 begins.

Success!!

Check from Steadman Hawkins arrived in the mail yesterday. I smiled and promptly went to the bank to deposit it. It's done and over and I am relieved that I didn't have to take any more drastic action. . . like crying and begging. :-)

For those of you who are in this same situation, know that the billing area in Dallas, TX doesn't really have a clue what's going on. When this whole thing started, they sent me a bill for the balance due and had no record of the fact that I had made an upfront payment. Also know that the insurance person in Steadman Hawkins's Vail office will refer any phone call you make to her to the Dallas office. They also don't keep good records of your phone calls to them. When you speak with someone, make sure to get their name and ask if they are putting notes into their system. And, most of all, be diligent!! Continue to call and ask them to resolve the situation. This is ridiculous I know but I think it's the only way to get things done. I have heard from another patient who has experienced something similar so I know it's not just me.

Now on to worrying about important things like Thanksgiving and Christmas and what kinds of things I am going to do with my 2 great hips!!

On a very fun note -- I bought a Zipfy. If you, like me, have no idea what this is, check out this link:
http://www.zipfy.com/videos/index.html

I think you will have to copy and paste into your browser. Sorry!


Can't wait to get out when it snows and try to kill myself or break something really important. :-) I haven't given up the idea of learning to snowboard this winter either. And, I still have promised myself that I will do my canyoneering trip to Utah sometime next year (that was my original goal after surgery).

The hip continues to be good!! Still an occasional adductor issue but they are becoming less and less frequent or severe. Workouts are good with no issues and my external rotation continues to improve. I am close to being equal on my right and left sides without really working to make it so.

It's becoming obvious to me that knee surgery could be in my distant future. My knees pop and creak and complain loudly during squats, lunges and climbing stairs. I am not anxious for any more surgery so I will put it off as long as possible but it's in the back of my mind.

Good news!

The physical therapy clinic in Vail is part of my PPO! Yippeeee!!! I got a call today from them and they had actually called my insurance company so they had all sorts of good information. I am thrilled. I am wondering . . . if they can get A-Rod back to playing baseball and Kurt Warner back to playing football, can they get me back to playing something? anything? :-) Maybe I'll have surgery and suddenly become a pro ______________ (you fill in the blank).

As the time gets closer, I get more and more anxious. Even though he's done my right hip, I keep going through all of the what if's . . . what if it doesn't work, what if it can't be fixed, what if . . . . . Well, the last one is a result of a phone call with a friend of mine today who informed me that a co-worker of his went in for knee surgery and died at age 51. Now THAT'S something that I really didn't need to hear today.

It's also time to worry about the really stupid stuff -- do i leave the outside lights on or off? How will I get my sprinkler system turned on and running for the year? I won't get to see all of the landscaping that I did last year bloom this year. Who's going to shave my legs and paint my toenails after surgery? Who will pick up the pamphlets that the Jehovah Witness people keep leaving at my door?

Ok, and my last thought for the night -- I am obsessed about the pain and nausea when waking up from anesthesia. It's a dread that has begun to take over any thought I have about the upcoming surgery. I have to get it out of my head and focus on the positives that will come about as a result of surgery. That is my focus for the remainder of the week. I'll keep you posted on my progress. Any thoughts or suggestions would be welcomed.

Two weeks before I leave

Ahhhh Sunday morning . . mostly a time for some serious peace and quiet but not the case this morning. Remember that I said I had been having no hip pain . . . HA!!! So, as typical, I did yard work yesterday for about 3 hours which appears was about 2 hours and 59 minutes longer than my hip could stand. I guess in a way it's ok. At least now I can say, with 100% confidence, that I am ready to get to Vail and get this over with. In fact, I am even going to start packing today to make sure I get all of the things that I will need for 7 weeks away from home. Which, in fact, brings up an interesting question . . . what exactly will I need for 7 weeks away from home?? If I sit and think about the coordination of all of this, I will have a complete and total freak-out, meltdown so I don't. I just plug away one step at a time.

Still no word on whether or not the physical therapy facility is a PPO with my health insurance. I am hoping to get a final answer on that on Monday so I can go to Plan B if necessary.

I also get to go have even more blood drawn tomorrow morning. Yippee!!! I think that will take care of all of my pre-op testing though.

I still need to notify all of the neighbors that I will be missing for some time and ask for their help in insuring that some, nice family doesn't take up residence in my house . . . a la The Visitor for those movie buffs. I also need to get my car in for the "please do everything you can to make sure it doesn't strand me in the middle of Kansas" check-up.

Ok, must stop now and get a whole list of things done.

March 26 - 4 weeks pre surgery

Exactly 4 weeks from today I hope I will be finished with surgery and on the road to recovery . . painful though it may be.

So . .. here's the history. I have slight hip dysplasia in both hips . . thanks mom and dad for the bogus hips. And, knock off the jokes about the pure bred dogs. Six years ago I finally met the most incredible hip dr who actually diagnosed that i had a torn labrum in my right hip and that was the source of the searing pain that kept me up at night contemplating suicide. He sent me to see Dr. Marc Philippon who was in Pittsburgh. On April 3, 2003 I had the labrum in my right hip repaired by Dr Philippon. Waking up from that surgery was surreal. It was supposed to be outpatient but my damage was extensive and the surgery took longer than anticipated so I ended up spending a night in the hospital. Two days in a hotel later, my cousin drove me back to Indianapolis where I started physical therapy.

At my six week check-up with Dr. P, he informed me that I had the same issue with my left hip. I argued vehemently that I did not but what did I know? :-) He was right and 5 years later while standing in my kitchen and twisting to grab something out of the refrigerator, I think the tear happened. I cried. I denied. I walked with a cane for weeks convincing myself that it would heal and I would be fine. This was in April, 2008. When, by July, 2008, I was still walking with a cane, I decided it was time to do the arthrogram and get results to Dr. Philippon.

Diagnosis of a torn labrum came back quickly from Dr. Philippon and the process started to find a surgery date in Vail. I settled on April . . .immediately after ski season . . to assist in my finding a place to stay and decided that I would stay for the entire 6 weeks to do all PT in Vail. April 23 was chosen as the date and I breathed a sigh of relief thinking that was a LONG time off and I would probably be fine by then.

So, here I am a month away, wishing I could be pain free and have this over. Anxiously awaiting April 18 when I pack up the car and half of my belongings to start the long drive to Vail. Focusing on getting my life back . . . walking, hiking, backpacking again!!

Welcome to my journey. It begins